Does your local supermarket have a ‘greeter’, that is someone who meets you as you enter? My local supermarket, ASDA, did. The first time I went there soon after it as opened I was met by one of their ‘greeters’ complete with an official badge – ASDA GREETER. I fell about laughing. Very quickly the women ‘greeter’ could not keep a straight face and was also in stiches. When we both stopped laughing she said ‘I was made to do it, I had no choice’. That was about nine years ago. She knew what she was being asked to do but had apparently been over-ruled by ignorant international management (ASDA UK is owned by Walmart USA).

So why the laughter? Well… the reason lies in the fact that Scots is a separate language from English. As an aside I shall be touching on that my lecture at the International Conference on the History of Freemasonry (ICHF) at the end of May. In Scots someone who ‘greets’ (grete, grat, gretis are Scots variant spellings) is someone who crys tears of sorrow. So, instead of the intention to ‘greet’ customers in a welcoming manner they were being being meet with someone who was tearful and full of woe!

As another aside in relation to Freemasonry. When the Reigning Master of a Scottish Lodge presides over his last meeting it is known as his ‘Greetin Meeting’ and is therefore his farewell meeting to which most of his Masonic friends try to attend.

ASDA UK is owned by Walmart an American company and so I suppose that they have some small excuse for not knowing the history and culture of another country. The employees who now meet you on entering their supermarkets no longer wear a badge proclaiming them to be a ‘greeter’.